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Post by Rat Bastard on Jun 25, 2005 1:30:37 GMT -5
Thank you, MrGrey!
The story is awesome! Not only did you nail every point of my humble imagining perfectly, you vastly improved on it. Having the student council present, throwing in suggestions, and transforming her slowly, bit by bit, is better by several orders of magnitude than the lame-ass "off-screen vote and immediate, complete transformation" I managed to come up with.
Thank you so much!
I have one request, though, if you haven't already done it that way: In the scene, where the mental conditioning, alternate personalities and trigger phrases are administered, could you leave room for there to be more of them than the ones explicitly mentioned? That way, when I (and hopefully others) continue it on the "Continuous Stories" board, we can invent new ones and just claim they were part of the "standard very *friendly* person package" that Dr. Kira installed, or that Ami didn't hear them being suggested, because she was still reeling from the last command, or something like that.
Once more, thank you for making my fantasy come alive in ways that I could never have done.
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Post by MrGrey on Jun 25, 2005 9:31:39 GMT -5
Done. ;D Can't wait to read it!
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Post by Rat Bastard on Jun 25, 2005 11:40:44 GMT -5
Well, hell! That's so damn HOT!
And now I'm stuck, trying to express my gratitude, without repeating what I already said after the first half. ;-)
MrGrey, you're the greatest!
Guess I better get cracking on the continuing adventures of Ami Takahashi, school slut extraordinaire! As you know from my initial outline, I already have an ending lined up, but first and foremost I want to have fun with what happens in between.
The first bits happen during the time that's covered by the story you wrote - somewhere between her transformation and her impromptu performance in class, which is obviously several days later at least. After all, she needs to introduce her family to the new Ami...
I should warn you that I'm a very slow writer - which is, after all, one of the reasons why I submitted the concept as a request - so it's going to take a while. It will also be mostly in the form of unconnected, episodic, self-contained pieces, which I hope will encourage others to participate and submit their own vignettes, without having to follow a specific storyline.
Thank you again, MrGrey!
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Kira
New Member
Posts: 1
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Post by Kira on Jun 26, 2005 12:42:23 GMT -5
I wonder who requested my name be used? I was certainly suprised!
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Post by Rat Bastard on Jun 26, 2005 13:19:25 GMT -5
That was me.
In my original plot outline I used some random name that I no longer remember, but by the time I submitted the transformation chapter as a story request to MrGrey, I felt that such an important character deserved an important name, so I used yours as a little in-joke. :-)
However, I'm surprised that this surprises you, since I mentioned it in a mail I sent you at the end of May. Given recent experiences with the... reliability of Yahoo's services, though, I guess I shouldn't be surprised if it never reached you.
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Post by babyios on Jun 27, 2005 13:40:46 GMT -5
Great story, shame about the ending though, I thought that there were too many role names...and also they made her soooo "nice"...why couldn't she be allowed to remember a bit about whom she once was and also...a home scene...what happens to her when she goes home???...
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Post by Rat Bastard on Jun 27, 2005 13:50:52 GMT -5
Patience, friend.
The story I requested from MrGrey marks only the start of Ami's misadventures, which I hope to continue as a thread on the "Continuous Stories" board. The second chapter, in which Ami does indeed remember who she once used to be, is well under way, and may even be finished tomorrow (but don't hold me to that). An exploration of her home situation will follow thereafter.
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Post by kanyon on Jul 2, 2005 20:32:28 GMT -5
Another great read, great job of suggesting it Rat Bastard. I especially enjoyed the different personalities implanted, it added quite a bit of variety. Can't wait to see where it goes from here.
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